Ah, it’s that time of the year again. The time when all good, spicy children hide from their families/Santa in clothing racks at the mall, and White Elephant parties make everyone cry; the time of the year when we wonder what kind of gift we should give that cousin who is really our uncle, and plot out how to avoid that dude from high school who grew up to become a “local, cherished thespian” when you go home for Thanksgiving. We can’t help you with all of that, but we can help you with some of it, because we can help you sift through the best Black Friday deals that would make great holiday presents.
Perhaps you’re gift shopping for someone you love in a horny way, or a platonic way, or a Gone Girl way. It’s really none of our business, but it is our business to make sure that you’re getting the best Black Friday deals, deals, deals on home decor gifts, streetwear gifts, electronics and tech gifts, and this crossbody bag shaped like a chicken. Whether your budget is under $30 or full Daddy Warbucks, here are some of the best Black Friday gifts to shop right now to get a leg up on your holiday shopping.
A faux fur throw fit for kingly chambers
West Elm’s Black Friday sale is already ripe with deals on mid-century modern couches, reading chairs, and rugs that make us look far more worldly than we actually are, but it’s the luxurious faux fur throws that have stolen our heart. One of VICE’s editors used to babysit for a rich family in San Francisco whose house was laden with the faux chinchilla and mink blankets, and she’s never forgotten how plush and relaxing they felt. Scoop one for your giftee (and one for you) while they’re 50% off.
A fully-functioning mini Atari
If you were a child of the 70s or 80s, the odds are you wanted an Atari 2600. They were spensi then, and they’re not exactly cheap now, but you know what is affordable for the gift sleuther on a budget? This fully-functional miniature Atari, which comes with 10 pre-programmed games such as Tempest, Centipede, Warlords, Asteroids, and Pac-Man.
This best-selling shiatsu massager
This is like owning a magic snake [rips bong] that works out all the kinks and knots in your neck and back, wherever you go, with all those heated deep-tissue rollers. It’s beloved by everyone from gamers and WFH folks to wellness sleuths and grumpy boomer dads, and is one of the best must-have items on Amazon that are actually worth it.
They might be an android
Bergdorf Goodman’s Black Friday sale section is dripping with gift-ready items that are up to 75% off, such as this pair of slick shades that will have them screaming, “Balenciaga!” louder than Myrtle Snow in American Horror Story.
A puffer that feels like a hug from a better mother
Are you from New York, even? One VICE’s editors is obsessed with the NYC-based outerwear brand The Arrivals, and has been spending the better half of soup season in its über warm sleeping bag puffer pants. The Haelo puffer jacket is the kind of ‘fit you can wear to the family function, or parade down the dirty midnight streets. It’s just that versatile, and well-insulated with eco-down that is made out of 100% post-consumer textiles. Cop it while it’s nearly $40 off.
This Dutch oven will become a family heirloom
Everyone dreams in shades of Le Creuset Dutch ovens. Seriously. Our mother still won’t give us her orange pot, and when we asked a bunch of men what the best gifts they’ve ever received were, this oven-safe kitchen staple was a proud headliner. The eight-quart beast is on sale right now, which means you can present it to your loved one by Trojan Horse-ing yourself inside. Take pix.
They’re the pot to your kettle
… Speaking of Jimmy Buffet sunset-colored kitchen goods, this cheery whistling kettle has a 4.5-star average rating from over 3,500 reviews on Amazon, and it’s currently 40% off for Black Friday. Slap a red bow on it, and you’re donzo.
The hot rod of kitchen appliances
You can get up to $100 off KitchenAid mixers at Wayfair, Amazon, and Williams Sonoma this Black Friday, including this mossy, matcha-colored standing mixer (which would love great with that sunset-colored kettle).
The alcohol-free aperitif of the year
You know who had a great year? Ghia. The non-alcoholic drink brand started out with a sexy, booze-free aperitif that VICE editor Hilary Pollack describes as both “visually appealing and amaro-like [in taste]” in her VICE review of the beveragino, and it also launched non-alcoholic spritzes that have proven to be an equally herbaceous, retro-inspired treat. They’re all 20% off for Black Friday, and perfect for anyone with tastebuds who likes to have a good time.
A multi-tasking record player
If there’s a vinyl-lover in your life who is also a little lazy (same), Audio-Technica makes one of the easiest-to-assemble record players on the maret that will automatically connect to your giftee’s speakers (or even Alexa device). The festive red edition is about $70 off at B&H for Black Friday, and, in the words of VICE editor Mary Frances “Francky” Knapp, “is an excellent record player for mid- to serious-level collectors.”
An otherworldly ring holder (that’s also an art object)
UK-based designer Hannah Simpson makes the kind of biomorphic objets d’art that interstellar dreams are made of. Her handcrafted, glossy ceramic ring holder is gently speckled with lilac and orange, and will make a handsome gift for your punk friend with tons of rings, the pal who always goes to Art Basel, and the one won’t stop talking about the benefits of microdosing shrooms.
Noise-cancelling headphones for under $100
Ah, the joy of swapping out your crusty earbuds for a pair of noise-cancelling, wireless Sony headphones. They make everything from cleaning around the house to the work commute so much better. This pair normally costs about $150 because it holds a 35-hour charge and has great sound quality, so you can blast the techno rendition of Michael W. Smith’s Christian rock classic “Awesome God” until the rapture is nigh, but right now it’s 55% off.
They’re a headlight on a north bound train
For a present that says, “I know you, rider,” we present this Jerry Time rug from Cotton On, whose Black Friday sales are offering savings of up to 70% off. It’s comfy, cool, and très forgiving to bong water stains.
Their identity is built around streetwear
They already own a pair of summertime Tevas—or whatever their ideal, socks-and-sandals normcore combo may be—but do they have the Holy Grail of ~moody~ streetwear sneakers, a pair of black Salomons? The XA PRO 3D Gore-TEX trainers are about $60 off for Black Friday.
Take it from us fellow hot people with wide feet: Hoka makes some of the best, most supportive sneakers for your flippers. The cult-fave brand’s Bondi 7 sneaker has a 4.6-star average rating from over 4,700 reviews on the site, and is over $30 off right now. Don’t forget to fill their socks with eggnog.
A fail-proof gift for skincare junkies
We are but humble lizards and deal sleuths at VICE shopping, but even lizards like to have nice skin. And while can’t speak for everyone’s beauty needs, Khiel’s Ultra Facial Cream is the GOAT, and pretty close to fail-proof; the facial lotion is a favorite of VICE editors, because it’s designed to hydrate various skin types without clogging pores. Smahs that order button while it’s on sale as part of the brand’s Black Friday best-sellers sale, which is slinging deals of up to 50% off.
Give this silk robe a role on ‘The Deuce’
You know who really is rich? Kim K. No wonder her bébé, Skims, has so expertly mastered the art of making pajamas and robes that feel next-tax-bracket levels of soft. The brand has tons of deals in its bi-annual sale section right now, inlcuding this retro-looking silk robe for $128 off.
If you can’t fly them to Japan (bring Japan to them)
If you’re new to Standard Dose, think of the wellness site as a dreamy emporium for all things relaxing, from CBD tinctures that taste like French butter to accupressure cushions that make us feel alive. Naturally, it’s the keeper of the cult-fave hinoki Boy Smells candle, and it’s going for 25% off as part of the Black Friday sale. The candle’s blend of smoking Japanese cypress and jasmine petals has earthy, spicy notes that will transport your giftee to a spa in southern Japan.
Happy holidays, and don’t forget to treat yourself to a little serotonin boost from the rest of the best Black Friday deals this year.
The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story. Want more reviews, recommendations, and red-hot deals? Sign up for our newsletter.